Reading through the comments, it's clear that you've already gotten some good advice. Instead of answering your question, I thought that this quote might be helpful by providing insight into solving your problem.
"Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything—all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure—these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."
Don't think that I just dismissed your question and posted some obscure quote (it's actually Steve Jobs from his Stanford commencement speech). I've weighed this carefully because it's clear that you're at a crux; this is an important time and I'd like to impart as much as I can to you.
But, Steve just said it so much better.
Tarks, you really just need to follow your heart. And yeah, that sounds like a trite mantra, but I think that you'll find yourself in a much better position if you take the risk and do what you want—don't live in the dogma of society. Take action and do what you've been telling yourself you want all along. Generally, our heart really knows what we want better than we do. And when we follow what we want, things tend to have a way of working themselves out.
Sure, keep your perspective; understand how the real world works. But just do what you feel is right.
Thankyou, I'd lost sight of this a little. teaching someone how to deal with a type of situation rather than a specific one is always useful in the long run.
"Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything—all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure—these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."
Don't think that I just dismissed your question and posted some obscure quote (it's actually Steve Jobs from his Stanford commencement speech). I've weighed this carefully because it's clear that you're at a crux; this is an important time and I'd like to impart as much as I can to you.
But, Steve just said it so much better.
Tarks, you really just need to follow your heart. And yeah, that sounds like a trite mantra, but I think that you'll find yourself in a much better position if you take the risk and do what you want—don't live in the dogma of society. Take action and do what you've been telling yourself you want all along. Generally, our heart really knows what we want better than we do. And when we follow what we want, things tend to have a way of working themselves out.
Sure, keep your perspective; understand how the real world works. But just do what you feel is right.
I hope this helps; good luck to you, man.